Volunteer Opportunity by Liz Drayer

We’re so thrilled you’ve offered

to donate your time to our cause

and know how you value

the privilege to serve

The police background check

is just part of the process

please visit your neighborhood sheriff

who’ll make sure you’re felony free

and that “sexual predator”

isn’t a suffix attached to your name

More good news –

your payment of fifty-one dollars

will cover the fingerprints

we’ll be collecting

for our special file

One final request

Would you mind

filling in those small boxes

with nine digits

Social Security gave to you?

We’ll rest a lot easier knowing

our unpaid employees

are citizens of this great land

When we’re satisfied

you possess high moral stuff

after a series of interviews

with persons who know you intimately

We’ll be glad to extend

volunteer opportunities

No thanks required

the pleasure’s all yours

 Liz Drayer is a public interest attorney in Clearwater, Florida. Her columns, fiction and poetry have appeared in a number of newspapers and literary journals.